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♥ ♥ 1 ♥ ♥

They’re singing songs of love,

but not for me

—From “Not for Me” by George Gershwin

CHAPTER 1

Own the Pain

He is gone. These are the words, but they may not yet have real meaning to you. A longmarriage is not so easily ended in the heart.

Like an old-fashioned clock wound too tightly, you may not be ticking, but your clockworks are okay. You need to grieve, yet may not be able to cry. Perhaps you can cry and can’t stop crying. Let the pain come out. Howl with it if you are alone and howling won’t bring neighbors running in a panic. This is animal hurt you are feeling. Go ahead and feel it. Slowly unwind what you have been holding in, what you’ve been fending of so you could get through the leaving part.

This is no time to be your own critic—sowhat if you’re maudlin, sentimental, self-pitying? Be these things; you won’t feel them forever, and they need to be felt and expressed, in order for you to get on with your life.

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