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Foreword

After beingmarried for 25 years andhaving thatmarriage end, I found myself an alien in my own world. I had friends—warm, supportive friends-but I could not or would not communicate to them the state I was in: I felt like a three-year-old lost in a vast, overwhelming city of sadness.

Nothing seemed easy or natural anymore. I struggled with the task of putting my shoes on. I struggled with decision making. Should I go get the mail or have a cup of coffee first? Many important decisions were made dangerously quickly. I couldn’t make sensible judgment calls. Business matters seemed no harder/no easier than the trivial details of daily life. What was worse, business matters seemed of no greater importance than such concerns as what dress to wear to the grocery store. I could—and eventually did—roust myself out of the numb foaties. One of the frst signs of returning “life” was that I longed for help, for a guide, for someone to say, “It’s going to be okay, the thing to do now is to put the other sock on the foot that is bare.”

Sharing experiences following the breakupofmy own longmarriage and drawing upon the experiences of other women, I have written what I hope will serve as a friend and a guide for you.

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