Page 13 - Father Earth, Daughter Sky

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Wood Thrush / Legacy
night, I stepped outdoors and took a deep breath in the
frosty air, and I spoke to the stars as if the sky was where
he resided now. I cried out, desperate for him to give me a
sign: perhaps a shooting star, a voice, a bird, something! It
was the first time I fully realized the impermanence of ev-
erything. I didn’t like feeling out of control. It was agonizing
to know that he wanted to live and had many dreams and
goals still lingering. I felt his torment of leaving family be-
hind. I was determined to find answers and explore possi-
bilities of re-connectingwithhimso that I could cope. Even
though I believed he was in a beautiful place, I couldn’t ac-
cept that he would not be involved withmy life anymore.
As a mother of three grown boys, I knew that I
wanted to be an example of directing my energy toward
healing and taking responsibility for wellness. In the
following months, I prayed, meditated, read books on
metaphysics, examined dreams, kept journals, and gath-
ered an enormous amount of information on recovering
from grief and understanding how to communicate with
his spirit. I became a seeker of truth; I wanted to explore
my true purpose and learn how to become the most
authentic person I could be. I wanted to connect with
Dad, but I also wanted to understand what brought him
peace. While spending a few days in a guided imagery
and breathing class, I met another participant, Tricia,
who sparked my curiosity.